March 16, 2003
7:05pm Sunday

THESE RHYMES ARE DARRYL'S, THE BURGERS ARE RONALD'S

This little dog got a special trip to the vet yesterday because he tried to chew his bottom off! Apparently this is what's known in Golden Retriever parlance as "hot spots," and our pal Paul's got em bad. For his efforts he got a big shot of cortisone, a bunch of dog cookies, his anal glands expressed (a bonus none of us expected), and a prescription for a new dog flea narcotic called Revolution. The Revolution will happen when I hand over my credit card for a month's supply because that crap is more expensive than caviar.

Paul weighs one hundred and three pounds. Gray and I laughed when we checked the "normal" weight chart on the vet's wall - typical Goldens max out at seventy. They forgot to average Paul in.

Sad admission: I'm sitting here trying to put another photo in that upper-right area, but I don't know enough HTML to do it right.

Somehow I'm listening to Kenny Loggins "Dangerzone" right now, an unfortunate auditory situation. This happens frequently in iTunes because of the alphabetic listing, and often I'll be listening to some great new thing (like for instance the new Justin Timberlake song "Rock Your Body". I'm serious!) and frickin Bon Jovi will come on. That isn't a good alphabetical example, but you get me. Then again, there are some nice surprises like Le Tigre's "Deceptacon," which just rocked on.

That reminds me of a story my now-successful writer friend just told me about how one of his long-lost friends from college who lives in Tennessee saw his credit on an episode and emailed him and was catching up and talking about old times and then suddenly cut the message off by saying, "I gotta take my wife to see Bon Jovi now. She's his #1 fan - the license plate on her truck says 1BONJVI." Niiiiicce. I must, in the interest of disclosure, now admit that I had the name of a rock band on my license plate in high school and through college up until my car exploded. It is still very cool, and holds a place of honor on my wall.

===

Tomorrow night I'm going to see Erasure at The Mayan with my friend and his gay porn star friend. Serious. I can't top that, so I won't say anything else except that tickets were fifty-eight fucking bucks!

===

I finished working on this at end of last week, and it wasn't as bad as I thought it'd be. I found I have a bit of a thing for Colin Firth. How unexpected.

Can't remember if I ever talked about Head of State, but it turns out I never got to work on it... and I never forgave Dreamworks for inviting me to a "screening" which consisted of sitting in their break room in a hard-backed wicker chair watching VHS tapes with timecode on a 27" television. I got some free Fritos and a Sprite, though.

===

I, like Pamie, can't get enough of "The It Factor" on Bravo, and it scares me how good that Krystal girl sings and how she could knock anybody on Americon Idol right on their ass. When she was singing at that party and that producer dude was all, "I went to a party way back when where Aretha Franklin sang and it was amazing and this was just like that, this is the second most amazing experience of my life," I was all choked up. It's nice when nice things happen to nice people. Jesus has her back.

===

I went to a comic book convention with Gray at the Burbank Hilton on Friday night, and it was my first one, and let me just say I would not be saddened if it were my last. Nerds, oh dear darling nerds. You are all nerds there, and the comic with the girl who has the three giant boobs - try again, nerds. The Care Bears plush toys, not so cool. The Hero Bear guy, okay cool, but not cool enough to lure me back again. Talked briefly to the guy who sold the comic "Thirty Days of Night" to New Line or someplace and is now writing the script, and heard about how he took it around town for years as a pitch and nobody would give him the no pun intended time of day, but the second he sent the press release saying he had an actual comic book everybody and their mother called him up with offers. Crazy.

===

Now I have to go recover from spending my whole day doing taxes and watching Bring It On. "Cheerleaders are dancers gone retarded." Hahaha. Oh dear.