Occasionally
somebody tells me I look like somebody who's famous, and it happened
most recently this morning at the bank. Now, this famous lady in
question is pretty good-looking, and I can assure you that I really
don't look like her. But some people get crazy and say, "Yes
you do!" and I say, "Thanks, that's very flattering, but
not really," to which they get kind of demanding, like you're
insulting their mother, and say, "Didn't anybody ever tell
you that before? Yes, you do!" What do you do if you think
it's just ridiculous, that maybe perhaps in a far-fetched way you
sort of look like her bloated, ugly cousin, but that a direct comparison
is too much? Then again, why am I fighting it? I should hire them
as my publicists and have them follow me around pumping up my ego.
===
At
a party on Saturday I got accosted by Bill
again. I wrongly anticipated that this wouldn't happen again for
another two years since that's been the pattern, but no, there he
was in his white-haired watery-eyed glory. He latched onto my arm
and sprayed me with the cracker-flake spittle that dangled from
his lips and flew out at me as he told me once again about his wife's
life-story. He said, "I think we've talked about this before,"
to which I said OH yes, and then I stopped him. By lying. I said,
"Bill. I hate to tell you this, but I'm no longer writing screenplays.
Only children's books. And I don't think your wife's story would
make a very good children's book." And thank you sweet jesus
he agreed. But then he asked me how to get in touch with Danielle
Steele and Judith Krantz since they'd be good choices to write the
story. I said, "Sure, you could contact their agents,"
thinking they'd throw his letter right into the can, to which he
said, "Maybe we'll just go down there." I try, people.
I try my best.
And
in the last October entry about him I said that I'd be busy playing
with my next generation digital camera the next time he cornered
me, and it kinda came true because I was playing a lot with a EOS-1D
Mark II at the party. It just wasn't mine, unfortunately. And that's
one hell of a camera, holy cow. But it's also four thousand dollars.
===
This
week'll be spent writing the screenplay and working on the documentary.
The kid's book is completely out of my hands as I wired the money
this morning to Hong Kong (scary) and they said they'd have some
proofs for me by the end of the week. But the script and documentary
-- lots to do.
Oh,
and I'm getting two minutes of fame tonight on primetime television.
My friend wrote me into CSI: Miami by way of giving the killer's
wife my name. I wrote to everybody I know telling them to watch,
and all the people who live in Los Angeles were like, "Uh,
okay. That's cool." Totally jaded. The out of towners were
more receptive, but I think pretty much everybody thinks I'm a dork
for being so excited about it. And no, it's not Megan Ward who I
(supposedly) look like in real life. But she plays me on TV!
