How
do I know whether or not my baby's cute? I think he's cute, but
does the rest of the world? I have some friends who had a very unattractive
baby, but they thought he was the bee's knees and talked about his
handsomeness constantly, and of course none of us told them the
truth because why step on their beer goggles? Stealthpunch Junior
could be hideous but you'd never know if from the way I look at
him.
===
I
go to that iVillage bulletin board that I've talked about pretty
regularly, and I just saw today that there are women who gave birth
a week after me in March who are already pregnant again. I shit
you not. I can no more think about being pregnant right now than
I can think about jetskiing all of Lake Erie on my head. Why do
that to your body, you crazy Irish-Twin makers? I guess maybe it's
nice to have siblings close to each other in age, but then again,
where's the individual attention for number one? How you gonna pick
him up and give him what he needs when you're eight months pregnant
and hurting? I don't get it.
===
I
think the assistant to the DA might get to me soon. This is because
of the midwife saga. Have I talked about this yet like I said I
would? I can't remember. I can't remember anything. I was feeding
Junior in the living room the other evening, sitting in a strategically
placed chair so that no one can see me from the window if they're
at the door, when someone knocked. Since my scuffle with the MPAA
private investigators over those Academy screeners years ago I hesitate
when answering the door anyway, but this time I just sat in my chair
and we kept doing our thing. So I hear a knock, then a pause, then
another knock a minute later, and then a guy presumably on a phone,
saying my name into it and asking if I'm there. I don't really get
that part since my home phone and cellphone didn't ring, but he
was indeed looking for me specifically. And then on the midwife's
message board (apparently all I do is read message boards in my
spare time) all these women started writing about how someone from
the DA's office had shown up unannounced to interview them. So I
was spared. But he'll probably come back. At least people are indicating
that it's informal and that no subpoenas are involved. I hate subpoenas.
===
I
haven't had much time to buy new music lately, but here's the baby's
bathtime mix we play every night while he splashes around:
He's
kind of one-track with what he likes. I just introduced him to Blondie
"Good Boys" and Jamiroquai "Canned Heat" and
he seems to like those. He's digging some Client right now, and
he's about to get an earful of the new Pet Shop Boys CD. But he's
shaping up to be quite particular without being discerning. I think
more exposure is in order.
