The
baby's asleep, and since I fired our housecleaning team I should
be using this opportunity to mop the floors. But I really hate mopping
the floors, so I'm taking this time to say hi to you guys instead.
Hi. I don't know what it is with me and housecleaners, but I've
had four different ones in the last year and I just can't find the
right balance of money spent plus me being guilty about it plus
hating their disinterest in cleaning thoroughly. Or maybe it's because
they keep breaking my bathroom fixtures and throwing them into the
back of the sink cabinet to hide the evidence. Well, it happened
once anyway. Did they think I wouldn't see that the giant bathtub
spigot was missing?
===
So
happy post-Thanksgiving. No family meltdowns this year aside from
a super-tiny one that was remedied quickly. Remedied with sushi,
which is a good remedy. How is it that this small little northern
California college town nowhere near the ocean has the best sushi
for the best price and the most creative chefs ever? It's bizarre,
but I love it.
Two
days after turkeyday we had a big family reunion where the baby
got to meet some of his other baby cousins for the first time, and
we also got to meet the newish boyfriend of one of the older cousins
who had been talked up like he was god's gift to this green earth,
so before meeting him we adult children had lots of fun at his expense.
Turns out he was a nice and interesting guy, so I hope he never
hears how we were saying "He's so charming he farts the smell
of pine forests," and "He's so awesome that he knows your
favorite scent and farts that," and "If I have to leave
while talking to him it's because I had to go upstairs and masturbate."
He did say Tom
Brady isn't good looking, though, which is just m-fing insane,
but then he tooted the smell of Reeses peanut butter cups and all
was forgiven.
===
We're
digging the show "Kitchen Nightmares," the new Gordon
Ramsey thing, and it turns out that our down-the-street restaurant
Sebastian's was featured a couple weeks ago. Gray and I went to
that place a couple of years ago, and if you saw the episode there
was no exaggeration about the crazy menu. You have to pick all these
things and then they come scrambled together, and Gray and I both
agreed that it tasted okay... for a third-grader's lunch. It was
like mac and cheese and french fries and a little meat, which in
a way is a beautiful taste explosion, but maybe to run a restaurant
where you expect people to come back for repeat business is far
fetched. We met the owner because he came over to chat us up while
eating, and he wasn't a super-tool then, but he sure was on the
show. I mean if Gordon Ramsey's giving you free advice on how to
keep your restaurant from going tits up, you take it. And as far
as all the other New York episodes have gone, are all the people
really like that on Long Island? (I will forgive Massapequa because
it gave us Alec Baldwin who is giving us 30 Rock which I can't get
enough of.)
===
I
saw the play Atlanta
the other day, which was written and directed by Adrian Pasdar.
I will just say that the music was hummable, which is what you want
in a musical, but also that Mr. Pasdar should not cast his Heroes
friends (i.e. Leonard
Roberts) in singing roles when they just can't sing. Oy. If
I had to pick one word to describe the play I would choose "meandering".
I
have seen exactly two movies on the big screen since I gave birth
nine months ago, so I'm totally out of the loop and can't comment
on anything film related. Except how in the world has that Enchanted
thing made as much money as it has? And I'll be finding a babysitter
so that I can go see I Am Legend, that's all I know.
===
I
just took a break to change the baby's diaper, and while he was
bare-bottomed I picked him up and stood in front of the mirror with
a camera to take a picture of him and perhaps I should have worn
my raincoat because he tinkled all over me. Also, today is poop
day. He's been pooping once every two days, and today's the day
that I can expect a giant explosion that comes out of every supposedly-elastized
crevice and may or may not end up in armpits and hair. Last week
was intro to black beans week and that was the worst. Even though
I mashed them up somehow they came out the other end whole again.
